Things have been ok for me except that I'm a zombie now. - Jonathan Coulton

This week has been an improvement to last week.  I have spent the entire week kicking it via the phone to my BFF.  I wish we lived closer.  However it is great to catch up.  Our roommate from college had a baby this week.  Of course we talked about all those "glory days" when we were at Auburn.  While I have to say that I am pretty high up on the happiness Richter scale these days nothing compares to those carefree days at Auburn.  Best times of my life. 

Speaking of good times at some point is all of our adult lives we have to start growing up.  Unfortunately that time is getting close for me awfully soon.  I have enjoyed all this Peter Pan time....now it is time to grow. 

My interest in life comes from setting myself huge, apparently unachievable challenges and trying to rise above them. Richard Branson

This is why it is fantastic to be a stepmom.  You listen to teenage girl angst.  You pay very close attention.  You nod your head solemnly and you smile like an ancient wise soul.  You place your hand under your chin as you ponder strife you could not imagine could occur to an upper middle class teenage girl.  Then you sigh and say with authority.  Go Ask Your Father. It is a fabulous power really.  I wish I could exercise it in all aspects of my life. 

SD had her first boyfriend last year.  Or perhaps crush is the better word.  It was obvious to me.  Here this little girl who I could barely get to take a bath with tears, threats, gnashing of teeth suddenly became exceedingly interested in her appearance.  It was a crush!  Of course the only thing that could change behavior like that would be a BOY.  Unfortunately this boy is unfantastic.  And I am so glad her interest in him has disseminated. 

It’s the most wonderful time of the year…no not Christmas.  The time when the munchkin goes back to school.  I love having her here, but I have to transition to my fall busy schedule.  No more of my summer lazy schedule. 

My bridesmaid dress came this weekend for my BFF Sally’s wedding.  Sally and I have been BFFs since 1995.  Fifteen years.  Oh my.  We met at Auburn when we were just munchkins ourselves.  After complaining to her that I am not feeling great lately, that I am struggling with some of my own personal demons.  She suggested that I go back to Auburn.  Pretend I am 18, rush my sorority again, and get our buddy Matt to make me a fake idea.  See this is why she is my BFF she always has the best ideas.  Unfortunately because of some of the events going on I may not be at the wedding.   We talked about it this weekend and she was so supportive of where my journey is.

"Life is not about waiting for the storm to pass, it's about learning to dance in the rain."

Today I want to talk about Bey.  When I met Bey in October 2002 he was dating someone very seriously.  I was engaged.  We did not see one another again until February 2003.  By February 2003 I had called off my engagement and Bey had put his ex on the road.  Yet we still did not start dating.  In February, I met a fabulous man that was all wrong for me!  I had to spend some time pursuing that insanity.  Then came the inevitable break up.  Finally late May 2003 we went on our first date.  We have been together ever since. 

But that is not what I wanted you to know about Bey.  When I met Bey he was a lot of fun.  I was not ready to get married.  But he will tell you.  He knew I was it for him.  He pursued me with a dogged determination.  He came by my house and spoke of how he saw his future.  He urged me to talk about my future.  Eventually we started talking about our future.

Then we got married.  Marriage is a funny thing sometimes.  It takes two people that know each other pretty well (we had been dating a year and a half after all), and turns them into two strangers that now live in the same house.  I started my doctorate 10 short days after our wedding.  I like stress.  Kidding.  Although you would believe that is true if you watched a movie of my life Drew Barrymore should play me I think.  We had a miscarriage early in our marriage.  We had regular stress of bills, and adjusting to life in Mississippi.  Then I got sick.  We had to face down chemo and radiation. 

We moved to Arizona and we were separated for 5 months.  During all of this time, I may have been the rock in our relationship, but Bey has always been the foundation.  He loves me.  He loves me so much I can relax.  I can take deep healing breaths around him.

Lately with some of the things that have gone on not only have I needed my foundation I have needed a rock.  He has been all that and more.  I have to say that I appreciate him.  This blogs for you darling. 

Lord Chesterfield -, “Persist and persevere, and you will find most things that are attainable, possible."

Is this always the best path? Is this always the way to go. I have never not once in my entire life ever given up on anything that I wanted. Once I decide I want something it is as good as mine. I stalked the neighborhood I wanted to live in ran spreadsheets and data until I found the perfect house that we could afford. Then at the perfect time I pounced like a cat on my goal and I had the house.

Point 2 I fought Maricopa County. I sued them and won. I had the guy by the tail. Hours of phone calls and faxing, and I won. We settled out of court and they had to cover my fees.

Point 3 when I was coming home daily crying about my Ph. D. crying because my professor or even some of the other students were horrible male chauvinist pigs; I did not once falter. I did not once stammer. I kept going.
I fight till the death to get my way. But today I am faced with a crossroads. Actually I won’t be faced with this crossroad until Wednesday so I am sort of borrowing a bit from Wednesday’s crossroads, but I digress. Do I need to keep persisting and persevering? Or is it time to lay this burden down? When is enough… enough? And why oh why do I have to put my Faith on the line about something I have no control over.
Persistence Perseverance my two best friends are you the ones I should be listening to? Bey and I have been married over 5 years. On our fifth wedding anniversary I asked him to tell me five things about me that he cannot live without. The second thing he listed was my dogmatic pursuit of my goal.
So as I sit, looking around my beautiful home filled with beautiful things, and as I wonder and cry. Do I fight or sit this one out?

When the world says "Give Up," Hope whispers "Try it one more time."

I miss my ‘rents.  I live too far away from them.  It is hard sometimes not to resent Bey for moving me all the way over here to this city so far away from people that love me.  Of course Bey loves me, but I still miss the ‘rents.  Daddy just bought a new boat, and we had a fun taking the boat out on Lake Lanier.  My entire family likes to be connected to the water. 

Since my parents have retired I have gotten to spend lots of quality time with them.  It is so great to see them so relaxed.  I am so grateful that my parents were young enough to retire at 57.  It has allowed them to enjoy their retirement.  My mom and dad both are in good health and just are really enjoying their lifestyle. 

And then there is SD.  I took SD with me to Atlanta this week.  I came upon SD whispering conspiratorially with my mom.  SD was trying to convince my mom to let her stay in Atlanta until school starts.  I guess so.  If I was spoiled like SD over there I would want to stay too!  :)

“Not all those who wander are lost.” – J. R. R. Tolkien

Life is short...wear red. - International Party Girl

We had an outstanding weekend at Casa de IPG.  Friday was Bey’s work from home day.  So we all spent some time hanging out and being a family.  Saturday was spent working, riding bikes, and swimming in the pool.  We went tubing down the Salt River a few weeks ago, and I believe we want to do that again pretty soon.  I have luckily had several classes end so it is kind of a slow week so I feel like I am a free bird.  : )

I have been trying to get Stephanie Meyer’s book about Bree Tanner read via the Internet.  I might have to break down and purchase it on my Kindle though. 

SD is at her grandmother’s this week so the house is quiet.  I have suddenly become sick of soccer now that the US is out.  Guess that is all in news…

“May you live to be 100 and may the last voice you hear be mine.” Frank Sinatra

Happy Birthday to the most wonderful man I have ever known.  To my husband, my best friend, my partner in crime, my confidant, my shoulder to cry on, my warrior of spiders, my biggest fan, my bed buddy, my caretaker when I am sick, the reason I walk around smiling the world would not be wonderful without you in it.  Have a wonderful birthday.

“Excellence is not a singular act, but a habit. You are what you repeatedly do.” Shaq

I need to commit to writing here more often.  Life love and appreciation just flow at my house.  Why isn’t that easy to write about?  I just forget, and I am busy.  I guess those are crappy excuses but it is what it is. 

We sold our boat, our refrigerator, our grill, and some sinks from our house.  This is because we are buying a new boat, we bought a new French door stainless steel fridge (my new baby), we had an outdoor kitchen installed at our home and our grill connects directly to the gas line, and we put granite in all our bathrooms so we had some leftover sinks.  We sold everything on craigslist in 2 days.  The wonders of modern technology…we sold our boat in 45 minutes leading me to wonder if we had it priced too low.  :)

Now if anyone has a jet boat that seats 8 in good condition from 2005 or beyond I would appreciate a phone call.  :)  Since I am buying.  We are boatless, and I don’t like it.  AND as annoying as this is to believe every boat I keep finding is out of state.  Poor Bey looks like I am going to drag him away this weekend after all. 

SD finished out the year with straight A’s so no homework for her this summer. I am however having her participate in the summer reading program so that we can all go to a Diamondback game again this year.  We did it last year, and it was a lot of fun.  SD and I were also planning on going to see the release of the new Twilight movie Eclipse, but she will be visiting her grandma at that time. 

Today is movie day at our house.  This involves watching Gone With the Wind, and Auntie Mame.  Those were the movies selected for this year’s annual movie day.   We will also be having Thanksgiving in June tomorrow on Bey’s birthday.  Finally we decided to add something new to our list of fun stuff we like to do in the summer.  We will be hostessing our first annual High Tea at the Case de IPG.  Everyone is going to wear hats, and drink tea and eat scones and maybe talk with British accents (this has not been decided on yet.  SD votes yes, and I vote no). 

Finally I am busy busy planning SD’s fabulous birthday extravaganza.  I came up with the idea in FEBRUARY.  And I have managed to keep it a secret all this time.  It is a major accomplishment for me.  Since usually I just spill the beans everywhere.  :)  It is a big huge deal and she is going to DIE when she figures out what it is.  I am really very excited about it!   Thankfully I don’t have to keep it a secret much longer.

He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland

This is dedicated to the 2 best dad’s in the entire world: my dad, and my husband. 

My dad says I love you many different ways, but growing up I did not get to see him as much as I would like.  However even though he worked, and worked hard for our family I learned my values from him.  I learned to see that he was the kind of man that works hard for his family, and loves us all very much.

I married a man very much like my own sweet daddy.  He is a wonderful man that loves me and his daughter very much.  His heart is as open and as kind as anyone’s I have ever met.  His little girl loves him with all her heart, and I do too.

To daddy, and Bey I love you.  Thanks for being the fathers that matter so much to me and SD.

A stepmom is a person who seeing there are only four pieces of pie for five people, promptly announces she never did care for pie. ~Tenneva Jordan

Hosted my very first stepmom group dinner party at my house on Friday.   I have been getting together with these ladies since November for a little dinner, and a little discussing life in a blended family and all that it entails: the skids, the husband, the bio mom etc. 

Sometimes in recent months it has become my life raft.  It is so good to hear that even when things are not perfect at my house that they are not perfect at anyone else’s house either. 

On Friday I kicked my family out so that I could play hostess.  My family went to the movies while I dished with my girls about the life and times of this not so wicked stepmom.  Usually our meetings only last an hour or two, but Friday stretched all the way until 11.  In fact my family had already returned home by the time the last stepmom left.

The evening was a roaring success.  I am pretty excited to be hostessing July’s meeting as well. 

Sometimes your only available transportation is a leap of faith. – Margaret Shepard

Summer is here.  The pool is warm.  We are selling the boat.  Bey is working from home one day a week.  My paper is almost done, and life is good.  I have some adorable pics that I need to get posted. 

Work is still busy.  I hate doing these drive by posts, but wanted to get something in...:)

“"I lose my temper, but it's all over in a minute," said the student. "So is the hydrogen bomb," I replied. "But think of the damage it produces!” Spencer Tracy

SD obviously worked hard today at school

I should not blog and say "Nothing new to report."
Actually that is totally unfactual. I have a myriad of new things to report the gravamen of the issue however is that the new material I have to report is dreary. Chapter 1 is done, Chapter 3 except for 2 problematic paragraphs are done, Chapter 4 needs work, Chapter 5 needs a bit more work. None of it is properly formatted. However I feel real progress in my bones. I feel dare I say accomplished?

“If it weren't for electricity we'd all be watching television by candlelight.” George Gobal

So last night SD was at our place, but I am not there.  :(  SO Bey had made her a delicious dinner of Lobster and King crab (Fry’s had them onsale last week so I bought a bunch. 

SD said to Bey…”I am going to start calling IPG the not evil stepmom.”  Bey said, “Yeah she is pretty good to you.”  SD said, “Yeah she is great.”

I turned in the final copy of my Chapter 1 to my advisor today!  THIS is the sound of relief!!!

"Travelling is like flirting with life. It's like saying, i would stay and love you, but I have to go; this is my station." Anon

What all has been going on?  LOTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

First and foremost I should mention I am once again out of town.  Out of the country.  Out of my mind.  One thing I have just recently realized is I hate being separated from the man.  Bey is an outstanding man!  I can’t believe how much I miss him. 

Let’s see I believe I mentioned I bought a new truck, and the pool was finished.  Work has been hectic and fun all at the same time.  My parents came for a visit which was nice to see them.  I can’t ever spend enough time with them!  It is so great that my dad is now retired.  I have never seen him so relaxed. 

Bey and I have been having a great time.  One thing that has been a lot of fun is settling in to our schedule.   Having SD every other weekend allows us to have alone time.  We are able to spend some quality couple time.

We went to a crawfish festival back in April.  It was nice to listen to Zydeco music and eat Jambalaya.  It was even nicer to spend the time with our friends and hang out with people from Louisiana that have been transplanted in Phoenix like us! 

SD was inducted into the NJHS (National Junior Honor Society).  We are so proud of her!  She looked so pretty at her induction ceremony.   I was so proud seeing her standing there with her candle. 

SD has been attending Bible study at church.  She is very dedicated and enjoys the study.  She has also made quite a few friends at church. 

My stepmom group is going well, and I have been enjoying getting to know my fellow Stepmom’s in the valley.  On Saturday, we went and painted our own pottery.  Not really my thing, but I still had such a blast with the girls. 

I’ll have some new school stuff to report directly.  Additionally now that all the projects are done around the house Bey and I can just settle in to our little love nest.  J